My husband and 7 year old son travel a lot internationally. We are scuba divers and have a place in Cozumel. We probably go out of the country about 3 to 4 times a year. I am very familiar with other cultures definition of clean and am willing to work with it without being rude. I've slept on bad beds and drank bad water. I've eaten strange food all in the name of traveling and experiencing the world. This little trip was our first time to Puerto Vallarta and our last. There were 9 people in our group made up of two kids ages 7 and 9 and seven adults. When we first arrived in the airport, we were bombarded by timeshare people. Tell them that you already own one save your breath and just push on through. After you clear the first room of timeshare people after customs, get ready for the excursion people. We found that we could book stuff cheaper from people at the resort or on the beach. Next was the arrival at the resort. The resort, Crown Paradise, is clean, but for all the people there, it really doesn't matter. There were so many people in every tiny pool on the resort that the people in the pool looked like a bunch of potatoes in a small pot. In the morning, there was a film on top of the main pool because of all the people. So count the pool out as a plus for activities. The buffet is gross. They seemed to have responded to the complaints of breeding bugs and are putting net over the fruit and vegetables, but the rest of the food is really bad and unrecognizable. The soup was the safest bet and it is available at all meals. If you expect to get a drink in a normal 12 oz cup, you better go elsewhere too. Getting more than 2 water bottles will cost you even if there are 3 people in your room. The restaurants are difficult to get into if you do not book right at 9 am - be sure to get in line. There was some difficulty in accommodating a party of nine, so we had to break it up. The Japanese was bad and the Italian was along the lines pretty dang bad. We were not able to go to the French restaurant because we had a 7 year old. Honestly, the best place we ate at and kept going back was in town upstairs in the market. The seafood was very fresh and inexpensive with a great view of the river. Back to the resort, the beds are hard, so be prepared; the beach only has very uncomfortable plastic chairs; and the beach is dirty. I highly recommend that you bring a premade sign that reads "No, Gracias, No." and the other side "No, mas." Stake and rope off your area with the signs and you will be somewhat free of the hundreds of vendors that go up and down the beach selling everything from necklaces to even tube socks. If you make any eye contact with any of the beach vendors they will rush over to sell you something. Since the pools are very full, we were stuck at the beach. the beach is a very large bay next to the marina. If it rains a lot the night before the water will be full of stuff. At 3 am, sewage is dumped into the bay for the city. It is treated but do be aware of this. My son is now on various antibiotics for an ear infection and staph infection. Another member of our group had to go to the hospital to be treated for a staph infection. The hospital in Puerto Vallarta is great if you end up needing their service. They are fast, efficient and very helpful with excellent follow up. They made my doctors at home look bad. Because the pools were so full, we really only felt safe to swim at the beach, but that obviously had its dangers too. As for tipping, everyone wants a tip but it doesn't improve service. Oh, and don't stay in room 455, the air conditioner barely works. When we complained, they told us it was working fine. Don't count on having the same number of towels in your room as when you arrived. The number seems to go down all week. Everyone in our group had this problem. We would get together at dinner and pool towels to make sure everyone had one. The floors are clean and the cleaning staff did a good job cleaning the floors. The resort itself is very clean and a lot of people are constantly working to clean the place. Neither of the kids in our group went to the kids club. They went to the kids pool which looks really fun, but not with hundreds of kids all over it. For safety reasons, we discouraged our son from playing over there. There is no way to keep track of our child with all the kids in that pool. I would even say that in the United States there would be some sort of violation for over capacity.
Good things about the resort: Clean, the people that work there are nice but somewhat ineffective in helping with easily solved problems - like air conditioner or towels, the soup was good, and if they bar-b-que outside by the outside cafe, the barbque is great.
As for Puerto Vallarta, it is a large city of 350,000 people. Everyone has to get their cut of your money. Beware of the Dolphin swim place, they charge $25 a picture and don't let you take your own pictures. in fact, the workers will stand in front of your lense so you can't get the shot. If you want to fish, flag a fishing boat down from the beach - it's much cheaper. Ask how much the cab ride is before you get in the cab, there are not standard cab prices - which is not unusual in Mexico. If they say to ride the horse to the waterfall, by all means ride the dang horse. I like to hike and paid the price - it was a mud slide.
My advice is if you like to experience the culture than stay at a place in town and do not go all inclusive; it is not necessary in such a large community. If you are really wanting to stay at a resort, stay at the Grand Mayan and go all inclusive. Avoid Crown Paradise. I know it is 3 star, but it quickly sliding downhill faster than the group can assess the stars. 3 stars is a compliment.














